2007-03-11T21:03:00.000-05:00

My friend will be missed

My dear friend, Harold, passed away this past Friday evening. Harold was a resident of the Veteran's Home. He died battling lung cancer, he was only 67. I was fortunate to be able to say my goodbye's to him before he passed. I kissed him on the cheek and whispered to him that "it was alright to go....your lovely wife is waiting for you". Hubby and I had grown very close to him over the past two years. He loved music......especially, Etta James. Oh, how he loved Etta!Hubby burned countless CD's for him. Harold served his country in the Army, then he served the people by being a Philadelphia police officer. Harold was a gentleman.......in every sense of the word. I will miss his beautiful smile and gentle nature. "love you, Harold".

Harold NEVER had any visitors at the home. NEVER once. As far as I knew, he didn't have any family.
Oh, how the vultures reveal themselves when someone is dying. There was family afer all. How they all swooped in and took all of his possessions even before he took his last breath. The son of bitches..........I hope they burn in hell. How can people be so cruel? I can't even think how family can be so fuckin' cruel. Yes, I am mad as hell. I am sick with anger and hurt for him.

I went to his room today and stood in the emptiness. Seeing everything that was there before, that wasn't there now. I felt so sad..........I felt so empty.
When hubby and I were returning from outside (had a cigg), I saw Harold's wheel chair in the hall. I walked passed it, then turned back because something caught my attention. It was Harold's little piggy cigarette lighter just lying on the seat. It was the lighter that I always talked about when he showed it to me. It was so cute.
I took the lighter...........someway, somehow, that lighter was meant for me to find. An act of God? I think so.
I shiver when I write this. It is so weird and I guess, fateful.

I put the lighter on the table next to my chair to remind me of my friend.

2007-02-08T18:39:00.000-05:00

Shocking?

I'm not terribly shocked at Anna Nicole's untimely death. It's very sad, but not shocking at all. She lived fast and furious. I've always had a fondness for her and I guess I kinda felt sorry for her too. I watched her reality show, it was funny as heck. She drew you in with her incredible beauty and her crazy/weird antics. I always looked forward to see what the hell she was going to do next.
I was so sorry to hear that she died.........so beautiful, so young........and a new baby girl to boot. It's a real shame.

2007-02-07T23:00:00.000-05:00

feeling puny

Argh.......I'm coming down with something. My throat is sore and I feel achy all over. My first sickness this winter, I guess that isn't too bad.

I've been trying to get organized around here......papers and stuff. I cleaned out our file cabinet, I have a trash bag full of stuff that has to be burned or drowned in the sink. I have a shredder, but that takes too much time and always seems to jam up. What I usually do is fill the sink with hot water and soak the paperwork, once soaked I then ball it up in a tight ball. Mush it all together. This is the easiest way I found to destroy sensitive material.

Anyway, I found some paperwork about my citizenship. I am a citizen, but Mom and Dad failed to have my citizenship certified once they returned to the US in 1955. So, I have to haul ass to immigration and get this stuff cleared up. I can't get my drivers license renewed until this is done. I need a photo license in order to get a new passport. I need the passport in order to go to Germany this summer. What a pain in the backside. See what the terrorists accomplished? We have to go thru hell and high water in this country just to get ID's now. Sucks.

My MIL got the results from the multitude of tests she has undergone these past few months. Both lesions (on jaw and lung) are lymphoma.........non-aggressive lymphoma. She needs no treatment now, but may have too undergo chemo in the future. So, we all consider this to be good news.

In other news......I've been listening to my first audio book. It's the lazy way to read! The book is, "The Grapes of Wrath" (great book and I know you've seen the movie with Henry Fonda as Tom Joad!). Twelve cassettes............I'm on my last one now. I'll tell ya, I just love it! You can relax, turn out the lights and visualize/understand so much better. I recommend buying an audio book, just to give it a try. :-)

2007-02-06T21:48:00.000-05:00

Brrrrrrr

It's been as cold as a well digger's asshole in this part of the country lately! I don't mind the cold and would really be happy if we got some measureable snow! I'm a winter type of girl. Hate the summer.

I'm so excited! I ordered 4 tickets to the King Tut Exhibition in Philly, we will be going on May 6th. Just imagine seeing artifacts 3,500 years old! WOW! I love reading and learning about ancient Egypt and now I will get to see these wonderful things in person! :-)

In other news. It's a go on the addition to the house! Our contractor has been out and we are waiting for his estimate. Hopefully he can start by springtime. :-)

2007-02-01T22:52:00.000-05:00

Freak Flag Flyin'

I'm sittin' here jammin' to Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young. Just wanted to let you all know.

Peace.

:-)

2007-01-26T23:16:00.000-05:00

We've decided

Thanks Kat and Kate for your advice!
It's not all that bad around here, really. We just happened to run into some punky kids........I'm sure punky kids are in every neighborhood. We've never had any problems since we've lived here (since 1993). Only the bad neighbor thing which resolved itself.

SO.............we are going to build on to our house. I'm calling a contractor on Monday to come out and give us an estimate. The same guy that installed our shower and put an addition on our neighbor's house. I really like him and he's a worker.......even on Sundays. None of that stuff working for 2 hours and leaving for the day.

Also, Mom is going to keep her house. We will have to keep up the monthly fee (maintenance) and electric. We'll use it for a get away house and it's not far from the shore. Hubby and I will have it when we are old folks (we will inherit it) and can't keep up this place anymore. Mom's house is in a retirement community not far from Kate. I am really pleased with this idea!
If our neighborhood becomes the pits in the future, we will have a place to move to. So, that is settled.

Mom hired an estate lawyer recently and he recommended to use some of her assets to build on to our house a MIL suite for her. Hubby and I will be her caregiver. This will be a legal way to invest some of her money and not to have all of it taken by the nursing home that Joe is in. Because, Joe is going to live to be 125 and we DO want her to live with us!

Anyway, I am so excited! Not only will be adding a living area for her, we will be siding the existing house, getting all new windows and a new roof. A complete makeover!

I'm hoping we can start this project as soon as the weather breaks!

What to do?

2007-01-18T09:46:00.000-05:00

Sometime this year we are planning on building on to our home a Mom apartment (living room, bedroom and bath). With her chronic back pain, she needs our help and we WANT her with us.
Here's the dilemma.......
The neighbor to our right has just put their house up for sale. We don't want to go thru the bad neighbor thing again. We had ghastly neighbors to our left side for 5 years before they were forced to vacate due to foreclosure. What a friggin' nightmare they were! Boom boxes and car alarms constantly. Fortunately, we have great people living there now.
So.....of course we are worried about what is going to buy the house on the left now. Do we grit our teeth and go ahead with our plans? Or, do both Mom and us sell our houses and find something some else with a little bit of land out in the country? Can we afford it? Are we getting too old to handle extra land? Should we move out of state where taxes are cheaper? Like Delaware?
One thing that I do know is that I've been seeing (and had some interaction of late) a lot of thuggish looking teens lurking around lately. You know, the ones with the crotches hanging down to their knees and butt crack showing. They are not from our neighborhood, they walk thru our streets to go who knows where. This scares me too. Are we going to be safe in our old age if we stay here?
To explain the interaction.......
Last week Mom, son and I were walking the dogs in the evening. We stopped to rest the dogs behind the elementary school near our home. As we were seated on a bench approximately 6 youths came into the school yard. From afar, one started asking us who we were, what we were doing there.......so on, so forth. Being a smartass I told him, "I don't know you, and you don't know us." We then figured we should leave. We proceeded thru the parking lot and then 2 of the teens started running towards us. Their action startled us AND THE DOGS! My big girls turned around, barked and snarled..........the two boys stopped in their tracks. heh.
If it wasn't for my doggies, who knows what would have happened? Now, I am forbidden to walk the dogs alone at night (hubby's rule). It's a damn shame what this country is coming to. To tell you the truth, I am not afraid to walk the girls at night after what I saw them do to protect us. I just hope someone trys to mess with me and them, it would be a lesson learned for the unfortunate soul.
So? Should we stay or move elsewhere?

2006-12-17T07:47:00.000-05:00

Sweet Ty

Ty is one of our Honored Vets that I've come to love while visiting the Veterans Home. Ty has MS and has been a resident of the home for 31 years. Yes, his life has been a struggle.
Ty is the sweetest man I have come to know there. When he smiles his blue eyes twinkle like stars. I always kiss him on the forehead and call him my sweetheart. Ty loves soap operas and Marlboro cigarettes. Since he can't use his arms and hands, he needs help with smoking. I've helped him many times with flicking the ashes.

Ty's last wish was a Happy Meal from McDonald's. He got it.
Ty died Thursday.

God bless him, he will be missed.

2006-12-11T09:53:00.001-05:00

forgot to mention this before!

Before the hockey game my son took me to a bar that he goes to sometimes, for a quick dinner before the game. You don't want to eat at the stadium! Nine dollars for a soda and pretzel!! Sheesh!
Anyhoo.......I don't like bars to begin with. CHEESY! But, I was a good sport. They had some thing going on called, "Jingle Bells Night". It's when people are escorted on a hired school bus and are driven to all the bars in the area. I think there were 13 bar stops. They stay at a bar for awhile and then get on the bus to the next bar.
I not a drinker, so naturally, I think it's a disgusting way to spend your time. LOL

So, we were sitting at the bar eating our pork sandwiches with hot peppers and horseradish. YUMMY!
Here comes a bus load of drunks. Oy.
Of course, one couple had to sit in a bar stool next to me. Oy. Yes, a couple on one bar stool.
The girl and guy were quite drunk to say the least. She was all over him, french kissing, rubbing all over him. Practically fornicating in public.
So, here I am with a pinched look on my face, trying to force my pork sandwich down my throat so we could get the hell out of there. Anyone who knows me can only imagine how my face looked.
I don't consider myself too much of a prude, but this took the cake! I was so disgusted with these two people at my elbow while choking down my sandwich.
I imagine when it was time for him to really Jingle Her Bells, he was so drunk that the idiot between his legs was about as useful as oars on a waterbed. I hoped so anyway!
I hate bars.

2006-12-11T09:53:00.000-05:00

2006-12-11T09:21:00.000-05:00

Tis the season to be jolly?

I'm trying to be........really I am!
Gift giving will be a bust for us yet again this year. No extra money equals no gifts. 'nuff said on that subject.
The worst news is that my Mom might have breast cancer.......AGAIN. She has to go in for more tests so they can be sure. She has been a breast cancer survivor for 7 years this month.
Second worst news is that my MIL has been diagnosed with non-Hodgkins disease. She also lost one of her breasts to cancer 31 years ago.
Santa, could this be a plot to make me crazy?

I confess, there has been some good things also. Hubby and I had an all expense paid weekend in Atlantic City for our birthdays.
Our son treated us to an Eagles vs Titans game at the Linc. My FIRST outing to a professional football game!
AND....my son and I had a special date. He took me to a Flyers Hockey game against the Washington Capitals.
Oh I had so much fun! I was in awe at these stadiums and all the people. I was just like a kid who witnessed these things for the first time.
See.....I ~~have~~ had an anxiety disorder. It's called GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder). For most of my life I was pretty much homebound for fear of panic attacks. Four years ago I sought help with medication.
I am a new person now.....thankfully. I can now enjoy life and all that it offers.
Thank you, Dr. Pearson.

2006-12-07T10:06:00.000-05:00

You Are Vixen

Sexy and sultry, you're the one all the other reindeer dream about.

Why You're Naughty: That fur pulling spat you got into with Dancer over Santa.

Why You're Nice: Because even when you're nice, you're still delightfully naughty!

Which of Santa's Reindeer Are You?

2006-10-13T15:46:00.000-05:00

Creepy

10-11-06

Write this date on a piece of paper and turn it upside down.
What date do you see?

Cory Lidle's plane crashed into a New York building on 10-11-06.
We all know what happened on the upside down date.

Uncanny.

2006-10-11T07:00:00.000-05:00

Wrap up

My men had a great time at the game! Caine came home hoarse and Hubby was exhausted. Of course there were the usual fights and beer tossin' at fans who had the nerve to show up in Cowboy colors. How stupid can you be, Cowboys fans? Never go to an Eagles game in opposing team colors. NEVER......

A close friend of ours won season tickets in a $5 raffle for all the Eagles' home games this season. Three tickets each game! I'm going to one game......maybe the next Monday night game. I've never been to a football game......I can't wait!

I watched the game at home. I did alot of screaming myself. :-)

Eagles Fans

2006-10-08T10:26:00.000-05:00

Eagles Fans, originally uploaded by CES1.

My men are leaving for the Eagles-Cockroaches aka Cowboys game in Philly!
FLY EAGLES FLY!
E-A-G-L-E-S!!! GO EAGLES!
T.O. = O.D.!!

Girls on their bed

2006-09-18T20:44:00.000-05:00

Girls on their bed, originally uploaded by CES1.

I think we should have made them a double bed! Ya think?

My New Chaise Lounge

2006-09-18T20:36:00.000-05:00

My new chair, originally uploaded by CES1.

Jealous, huh?? This huge, over stuffed chaise is awesome! So soft and comfy, and you can sleep in it too. The backrest can be postioned down. This is my reading chair!
Thank you, Ma! I love it!!

Mom's Room

2006-09-18T20:32:00.000-05:00

Mom's Room, originally uploaded by CES1.

Since Mom is spending so much time at our house, and lacking a spare bedroom..........we turned our dining room into a bedroom for her. Nope, we no longer have a table to eat on........tv trays are very popular in our house. Didn't the room turn out cute? There are curtains there to draw closed at night. Hardly noticable during the day when they are opened. She has a nice view with the patio door by her bed too!

2006-09-09T08:48:00.000-05:00

Hurt

Yesterday I finally transfered my Dad's cremains to a nice urn. I was so afraid of spilling "him", but the transfer when off without a hitch. I hope he approves of his new resting place. ((Dad))
Also, I have begun to read my Dad's journals that are contained in two boxes that I received from the prison after his death. How lucky can a daugher be with a Father that kept journals?? Amazing! It's taken me a few years to be able do this because of the pain in my heart.
The journals are awesome! They are so creative and full of insights....I am at a loss for words. There's a man behind those writings that I never knew. How sad is that? I shake my head in regret and on the other hand, I am filled with love and wonder.
This will be a journey for me.......a special bond with my Dad whom I loved with all of my heart and soul.
Thank you, Dad, for leaving me with something that I can treasure forever and ever!
I love you.

2006-08-31T11:46:00.000-05:00

hidey ho!

I'm at Mom's house at the moment. We'll be heading south (my home) tomorrow before the big deluge of rain from "Ernesto" comes in tomorrow evening. I'm up for some wild weather!

Nothing much going on over here. I took all the ladies (Mom, Rosie, and Molly) to their doctor appointments yesterday. Afterwards, we stopped for lunch and then did a little shopping. I bought a new pair of jeans....I'm now sporting a size 12! aarrgghhh! I've gotta stop munching on tasty treats. It's SO damn hard.

Anyone watching, Rockstar: Super Nova? Yup, I'm hooked on this guilty pleasure of television viewing. It's down to 5 singers now.......I really like Magni and Delana. I'm glad Ryan was dumped, didn't like him one bit. Jason Newstead is such a babe! I love watching him play! Yes, I am a Metallica fan at my old age! (grin)

Well, gotta run......we sent out for a pizza and I'm starved. (another tasty treat) God, help me.

2006-07-30T20:30:00.000-05:00

hot fun in the summer time?

Well, it has been hot as hell and as far as I'm concerned, it ain't no fun! Especially when you don't have central air. :-(
I used to love the heat of summer, but now that I'm a cranky old fart......I hate it.
Gimme a blizzard any ole day!

Mom is back from her vacation to Germany. It's hot as hell over there too and many do not have air conditioning since the climate has always been cooler, until lately. Global warming? Who knows?
I've decided to take the plunge (NOT a good word!! Yikes!!).....I'm going to Germany with Mom next year. It's a once in a lifetime chance for me and I really want to go back to my roots. To see the beautiful sights and visit the town where I was born and lived.......and of course, see my Aunt and Uncle. I have to face my fear of flying.......it's such a stupid fear really.

I'm still practicing the guitar.......I'm a bit better with strumming and changing chords. I learned a new song, "If I Were a Carpenter". I still have to read the music sheet while I play, my memory skills ain't what they used to be.

Well, off to listen to the son play........he's playing and singing, Gun's 'n Roses: "One In a Million". Caine is really good on the guitar now! WOW!!

2006-07-05T21:52:00.000-05:00

what's been going on you ask?

I spent Father's Day at the Veteran's Home with one of my sweethearts......I do have many (ahem). Since my Father is deceased, I spent the day with my special sweetheart, Dave. He's 89 (?).....but has alot of spunk, and gets fresh sometimes too!
Mom is in Germany. She'll be home on the 16th. I miss her.....my heart feels empty. But, she is having a great time! I'm trying to talk myself into going with her next summer......I'll need plenty of xanax and a kick in the ass. I'd so love to see the place where I was born and where I lived as a little girl.
We didn't do anything on the 4th except BBQ'ing. Too much traffic to go and see the fireworks....yes, I am getting old. No patience with assholes on wheels. Besides, I didn't want to leave my doggies home alone with all the firecrackers going off in the neighborhood. Dixie is scared shitless.

I saw something grotesque today........and can't seem to shake it from my mind. We all see dead deer along side the road, right? Well, I've never seen a dead deer with it's head chopped clean off. Someone cut this deer's head off!!! A cut clean as a whistle. What kind of awful person would do something like that and leave the body there? ::shiver::

2006-06-16T07:48:00.000-05:00

Happy Friday

I'm happy because it's Friday and because I've got the WHOLE day to myself! Wheeeee!
I don't know about anyone else, but I need my space, some alone time, no one around......and I don't have to cook dinner tonight! A little slice of heaven on earth.

The other day I took my guitar to the Veteran's Home and played a song for some of the guys who were hangin' out on the verranda. I even SANG the song! OMG, I can't believe I did that! But, I did. :-) My first one song concert! LOL Acutally, I hadn't planned on playing for anyone but, Joe. But, Mr. A, saw the guitar and wanted me to show him what I have learned..........how could I refuse? Yes, I was nervous, but I did it without a hitch. I did "Wonderful Tonight" by Eric Clapton.

I am so proud of my accomplishment!

2006-06-12T15:24:00.000-05:00

gone

I'm sorry to say but I think that poor dog didn't survive. I just noticed that his dog house is gone from the yard. :-(

2006-06-10T10:45:00.000-05:00

Terror

Has anyone experienced and witnessed.......AND heard...... an animal in sheer, excruciating pain? Unfortunately, I had this experience yesterday evening. I can't seem to push the lingering thoughts out of my brain. I even had to take a Xanax to calm down, which I rarely indulge.

As I was standing in front of the sink washing the dinner dishes....above the tap water running I could hear some sort of screaming and howling. I was thinking, "What the fuck is that noise?" I turned off the tap and with dish towel in hand I headed for the front door to listen where this God awful noise was coming from. I saw one of my neighbors heading towards the back of a house where there is a Husky breed dog in residence. That dog does carry on sometimes........BUT, this was different.
With dish towel in hand I headed over with my neighbor to see what all the hub-bub was about. In the mean time, another other neighbor was following in pursuit.

OMG! This poor dog was suffering so badly, I couldn't help but cringe with bile rising into my throat. The crying of pain from this animal was beyond description. Like I said before, I can't get it out of my mind.

The dog looked to me like he was trying to have a bowel movement and couldn't. He would cry and scream when pushing. I had first thought that he had broken his leg or some kind of injury like that. After talking to the owner who was outside with the dog.......she told us that he was CONSTIPATED. Constipated is an understatement! He was acting like a brick was lodged in his colon! I've heard of shittin' bricks before.....but, not in the literal sense. She told us that she was going to dislodge whatever was causing the problem........she had rubber gloves on. Yeah right, lady. Suuure you are. She was waiting on her husband to help hold the dog. I told her that she better wrap something around his muzzle, like a leash, before she tried that maneuver.
Anyhoo.......I wasn't waiting around to witness that! There was nothing I could do anyway......I sure wasn't going to help hold a dog in distress that didn't know me.
So, I left.
I came home and told everyone what was going on. We still heard the dog crying and screaming for a little while. Hubby and I went outside to see if anyone was still tending to him. I guess the owners finally got smart and was putting the dog in the car to take him to an animal hospital or vet.

Thank God! I couldn't stand it anymore.

The dog isn't back yet. I hope he survived this crisis.

2006-06-07T21:11:00.000-05:00

survived

Well, we all survived yesterday's doomsday prediction. No devils, no anti-christ, no fire and brimstone.....just a bad remake of, "The Omen". Gregory Peck could never be replaced...Lee Remick, either. I won't even bother seeing this movie. However, I do like Mia Farrow......especially in, "Rosemary's Baby". Excellent film!

In news from our homefront.....

I've learned two songs on the guitar. "Wonderful Tonight", by Eric Clapton and "Hurt", by Johnny Cash. (original by Nine Inch Nails)
I can do a lot of riffs, but am having some problems with barre chords. My fingers have a mind of their own! Practice, practice, practice.

I have a new little pet plant to tell you about. Her name is Ophelia, she's a venus fly trap! I made a terrarium for her, (yes I did do some research) and she's thriving so far. She loves the yummy bugs that I feed her.......I'm so amazed with this plant......it's something right out of a science fiction movie! You can buy them at Home Depot.....IF and WHEN they are in stock. It seems I'm not the only bug eating plant enthusiast! A great plant project for the kiddies...they'll get a big kick out it!

I have a rant.
Why is it that every where you go, just about everyone has their ear glued to their cell phone? What the hell is everyone talking about anyway? How in the world did these people get along before cell phones? It boggles the mind.

2006-06-05T07:29:00.000-05:00

six six six

As you can see I prefer not to write those dastardly numbers in their numeric form. Now that that date is fastly approaching us.......I wonder what will happen on this so called "devilish" day. Will it rain fire and brimstone? We wouldn't dare nuke Iran tomorrow, or would we? Bush and his crew would have an excellent excuse......."the devil made me do it." Just think of all the sins we could commit tomorrow and blame it on the devil. No one would be convicted of sinful crimes, because the jury would be just as guilty. We could all wallow in sinful depravity and never have to feel guilty because we can blame it on you-know-who.
I have to giggle.......I can just imagine all the so called Christians sporting huge crucifix's around their necks tomorrow to ward off the devil......I imagine all that "bling" just might be attractive to him. Not a good idea people.
God only knows how many people will commit the ultimate sin of suicide tomorrow, because they are scared shitless that the devil has got them by the......tail.

It's all so amusing that everyone is so up in arms about a date on the calendar. Horrible things happen EVERY day.......not just on 6-6-06. How delighted Satan must be........all this attention he's getting. I can just see him now.........was that a giggle I just heard?

2006-05-07T21:21:00.000-05:00

Do you ever wish....

a book would never end? Fortunately, there a two more to read from this trilogy and I just bought number 2 and 3 on Amazon. I bought the 1st book at a flea market in Delaware last week for 2 bucks.
The trilogy is, "The Liveship Graders" by Robin Hobb. The first novel is, "Ship of Magic", 2nd is "Mad Ship" ,and the 3rd is "Ship of Destiny". I can't wait to sink my teeth in the 2 remaining novels!! I saw that this author also has other trilogys.......OMG......I'm in novel heaven.

The weather here in Jersey has been wonderful.......we finally had a spring season! We'll be planting the flower beds in a couple of weeks, don't want to plant too soon for fear of frost.

Well, I'm off to watch some local news and sip my hot tea.

2006-05-06T13:28:00.000-05:00

spring mess

Our whole yard is littered with helicopters. Not the mechanical kind......the kind (seeds) that fall off the maple trees that you can peel and stick on the end of your nose. Ever do that when you were a kid? I still do it.

I haven't been blogging for a time......haven't had much to say I guess. Reading has been occupying most of my spare time lately. Wanting to blog has been a million miles away from my mind. Actually, I'm rarely on the computer.....only for work and looking up stuff.

Speaking of work. I have to get downstairs and poly a bench for my MIL. I really don't feel like it, but hubby would pout if I didn't help. MEN!

Miss America

2006-02-18T10:46:00.000-05:00

Miss America, originally uploaded by CES1.

all in all, a very nice visit with our country's Miss America. After this shot, Joe kissed her hand (mayonaise and all...he was eating a turkey sub), then she shook my hand and hubby's hand.
There was a military photographer in the room taking shots as well. Also her spokeswoman was present.....and a bunch of other people too.

Young Miss Jennifer Berry was very charming......and oh so thin!!! (I hate her.) lol

Miss America

2006-02-18T10:40:00.000-05:00

Miss America, originally uploaded by CES1.

Oh.....the crown had criss-crossing elastic bands and is held on with bobby pins. Interesting, huh?

Miss America

2006-02-18T10:39:00.000-05:00

Miss America, originally uploaded by CES1.

I made a big boo boo in this shot.....can you guess?
I forgot to remove Joe's johnny coat aka bib. UGH. (it was lunch time)
Joe was very pleased to meet her and asked her how old she was. LOL (22)

Miss America

2006-02-18T10:36:00.000-05:00

Miss America, originally uploaded by CES1.

I can see me kneeling in high heels! I'd have to roll on to my side and gather myself on to my knees......very gracfully I might add.
Not sure whom she is visiting with from this angle.

Miss America

2006-02-18T10:31:00.000-05:00

Miss America, originally uploaded by CES1.

A better shot at this angle. Who the people were in the choir clothes, I have no idea!

Miss America

2006-02-18T10:28:00.000-05:00

Miss America, originally uploaded by CES1.

Here is Miss America in the auditorium.......we spotted all the hub-bub when we came in the entrance to the home. Of course, we just had to see what all the fuss was about......HERE SHE IS.....I mean, there she is! So, I grabbed my camera. (we know she was visiting the vets when reading the morning paper)

Notice "Mimi" from the Drew Carey show on the right. What was this woman thinking when she got dressed this morning???

2006-02-14T21:03:00.000-05:00

oo la la

Your French Name is:

Valérie Besson

What's Your French Name?

2006-02-14T20:31:00.000-05:00

Hideyho!

We had about 7" of snow from our snow storm on Sunday & Monday. I have to post a picture of the back yard.....it soooo beautiful! Right now I'm too lazy to upload the pics from the camera to the puter. I'll get to it later on.

Mom left today, she came down last Thursday for a visit. I always hate to see her go....but, then it's nice to get things back to normal around here. Joe is doing okay, but he swears everyday is his last........he's been swearing this for about 10 years now. I've come to find that he is a very good actor......Academy Award material for sure. Yes, I'm a big angry with him right now.

I did submit my employment application to the home.....unfortunately, there is a hiring freeze at the moment. My timing is incredible.

I just finished reading the novel, "Desiree", by Annemarie Selinko. It's about Napoleon Bonaparte and Desiree Clary. A wonderful novel!!! I recommend it highly!! I just ordered the DVD from Amazon. I've seen the movie a million times.....but, it's a keeper.

Hubby is sick with a bad cold that seems to always come back......he just can't shake it. Caine had the same thing.....actually, he brought this sickness home from work (everyone there is sick too). Fortunately, I've been spared so far. I've already had a cold this winter........I want no more of it!

The girls (my doggies) are loving the snow! All white noses and wet feet! :-)

I'm off to watch some olympics! Nite all!

2006-01-28T19:55:00.000-05:00

hi friends!

Bet you missed me, huh? (yup)

I've been a little busy and a little lazy (to blog). I've been reading alot in the evenings. As soon as the guys go to bed, I grab my book, my hot tea, some cookies, my blankie and I languish in my chaise lounge to be taken away to another time and place. I finished, "The Biography of Henry VIII", by Margaret George. It was so damn interesting I couldn't put the book down......I was reading well into the twilight hours (yawn). Now I'm reading, "Mary Queen of Scotland and the Isles" by the same author. This novel has been keeping me up past my bedtime as well. Margaret George is such a wonderful author! If you like historical fiction, READ her books!

We've been going over the Veteran's home a couple of times a week. I still haven't submitted my employment application........I don't know what my hold up is. Maybe cuz I'm afraid to go back to work, or maybe I'm afraid that I won't get a job there. I saw a stack of applications that were submitted.......it doesn't look good for me, that's how I feel anyway, like I don't have a chance in hell. Yes, I'm thinking negatively. Well, I'm going to submit it next week and see what happens. I might as well give it a chance, right?

I love sitting with the old guys and shootin' the breeze......wish I could get paid for it!! I bring smokes for some of the guys who don't have anything and we bought a blanket for Mr. Artemus because he is cold at night. I bought some Cream Savors candy (yummy) for Miss Marie......yup, the place is co-ed. It feels so good to give to others........even if it is just a hello or holding someones hand. I wish I could do more for them. Next Saturday I have a "date" with Dave to play Bingo. His eyesight is very bad and needs help playing.

Well, gonna run and watch some tv. Night all!

2006-01-03T22:13:00.000-05:00

last night

.....as I was browsing though our old VHS video tapes I discovered some home movies from 1987 and 1988. Of course, we just HAD to watch them!

Good lord, I was as skinny as a rail back then and I had no boobs! I guess I probably weighed about 115lbs. at a height of 5'10". That's super model skinny. That's also sick skinny. My facial features were so sharp and I had hollows in my cheeks. God, I looked so fragile.
I also had a untreated anxiety disorder and lived on pepto bismal. That was not a good time in my life.
As I was watching myself in the Christmas video shots.........I could almost feel the anxiety I felt back then. I hated to be the center of attention.....so while opening gifts........I was the center of attention. I felt panicked. And......I never wore that black leather mini skirt that I received as a Christmas gift from my Mom in that year of 1987. I remember that skirt........how could I ever wear it? I had too much anxiety to even leave the house in those days.

Watching those memorable moments made me laugh, but those memorable moments also made me so very sad.

2006-01-03T22:11:00.000-05:00

Your Birthdate: November 13

You're dominant and powerful. You always need to be in charge.
While others respect your competence, you can be a bit of a dictator.
Hard working and serious, you never let yourself down.
You are exact and accurate - and you expect others to be the same way.

Your strength: You always get the job done

Your weakness: You're a perfectionist to a fault

Your power color: Gray

Your power symbol: Checkmark

Your power month: April

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Dancing Chicks

2005-12-31T23:31:00.000-05:00

Dancing Chicks, originally uploaded by CES1.

Mom and I cuttin' the rug on New Year's Eve!
No, we're not drunk...........yet. (hiccup)

2005-12-31T23:19:00.000-05:00

In the year 2006 I resolve to:

Learn to play the guitar with my teeth.

Get your resolution here

Happy New Year, everyone!

2005-12-25T22:51:00.000-05:00

Merry Christmas!

Hoping everyone enjoyed their Christmas Day!

While hubby stayed home to watch over the baking turkey.........Caine, Mom and I went over to the veteran's home to visit Joe and the other vets. Needless to say, being over there made my day much more special. I was so happy to see alot of family members visiting their loved ones! :-) Alot of these guys are very lonely and depressed.......a visit really perks up their spirits.

We had a nice turkey dinner when we came home.......everything was delicious.

All in all, Christmas was a delight this year! :-)

2005-12-22T22:36:00.000-05:00

Christmas with the Vets

On Tuesday evening we attended a Christmas party for the vets on the Liberty Wing of the Memorial Home. Unfortunately, we were the ONLY family members of a vet that showed up. That really galls me. You mean to tell me that no other family member could take a couple of hours out of their *busy* schedule to come to the party? Give me a break. It just goes to show how much people care nowadays.
Anyway........the party was really nice and touching. All the guys got a shopping bag full of gifts donated by different organizations. Even Santa took some time out of HIS busy schedule to visit the guys! :-)

Earlier in the day we visited the doggies and kitties at our local SPCA. We brought 2 large bags of dry food and a bag of milk bones that we gave out personally. OMG......the puppies that were there! So damn sweet! All the dogs were so happy to have visitors.......and I got plenty of kisses and love. It's always a bittersweet experience to spend time with unwanted pets. If I could take them all home.......I certainly would. My heart breaks everytime I leave.

You know......doing things that I described above is really what Christmas is all about. I've seen the craziness in the stores......people buying anything and everything.........frustration, rudeness, stress.........and going into debt over just......stuff and more stuff. It's ridiculous and sad. Anymore, Christmas is a retail holiday, not a spiritual holiday. Thankfully, we don't get caught up in this fiasco anymore (we used too, and I hated Christmas for it).......now we do things that warm our spirit and we don't go into debt doing it.

Tomorrow Mom is coming down for a few days. We will be visiting the in-laws on Saturday and cooking a turkey dinner on Sunday. After dinner we will all be heading over to the home to bring Joe a nice plate of food and spend some time with him and the other vets. I'm looking forward to it! :-)

2005-12-17T22:59:00.000-05:00

Here I am playing like the wind.........yeah sure. :-) I was messin' around on Adobe Photo Shop 6 and added a wind distortion to the picture. Pretty cool, huh?

Anyhoo......I picked up an employment application for the Veteran's home, maybe I'll be a working girl again. Ya think? I'm really nervous......but excited all the same. I don't know what the hell I'm going to put on the application about my prior work history........I haven't worked since 1993. The jobs I've had prior are:

2 years at The Department of Labor and Industry in Trenton. (State job, '72-'74) Yup, I did pass the civil service test. :-P Clerk typist, the job sucked.

A *month* as a desk clerk at a local motel. Midnight shift....that job REALLY sucked and I didn't put up with those hours too long. Screw that!

3 months at a PicWay shoe store (now known as Payless Shoes). That job sucked too. My boss was an asshole....the little prick.

11 years at a millwork company......part time. Job sucked, but enjoyed the people there. I was the only female employee in shop. I was married.....so stop thinkin' dirty. However, I could have had my share of men if I wanted to. No thanks.

So......I'll be filling out my application and turning it in this coming week. I'd like a clerical job if possible. They do have a ceramics studio there, I wouldn't mind that either. Also, I'd take anything that interacts with the residents....but....... I won't wipe asses.
I love the place, I love the people there.........I'm comfortable there. Perfect.

arkbirddogs1kk

2005-12-14T22:03:00.000-05:00

arkbirddogs1kk, originally uploaded by CES1.

Aren't these guys a hoot? :-)

2005-12-14T21:57:00.000-05:00

Hidey HO!

Just taking a break from guitar practing and figured I would post something.
At the moment I'm learning some of the chords to Metallica's, "Unforgiven". It's basically:

Am, C, G, Em, Am, C, G, E, Am. It's played on the first 3 frets.

I've learned alot of the basic chords, but my strumming sucks big time. I know, it will come in time.......and with alot of practicing. I'm determined to play the guitar.......even if I'm 80 by the time I get it right!

We picked up THIS electric Fender Stratocaster for Caine for Christmas. Of course, he got it early and has been playing like crazy.

Just some advice for beginners.........If your finger tips are KILLING you, buy some of those rubber finger tips at any local office supply store (got mine at Staples). Cut them to fit your finger tips......NO MORE painful fingers! Also, don't put the heavy strings on your classical.....buy the light metal strings.

All in all, things are fine over here! We moved Joe over to the new building last week......the place is like a five star hotel. Gorgeous! Our vets deserve the best! I'll take some pictures when I go over there to visit.

2005-11-21T21:54:00.000-05:00

I'm HOME!

I was a total lazy slob while visiting Mom this past week.....shame on me. Well, I wasn't really a slob.....but, I sure as hell was lazy! Actually, I was so bored with the laziness that I couldn't wait to get back home to my mad house.
We did go out to dinner a couple of times and went shopping.......the rest of the time I was a slave to the tv and the flipper. Yup, I was THE flipper Queen.......at home the flipper is glued to the hubby's chest. I'm the flipper peasant until he goes to bed.

With all the terrorism shit going on........would you believe that they have rent-a-cops guarding the entrance to Ft. Dix? Well, believe it. I was shocked.......this is how the military is defending our bases and posts? The guy barely checked Mom's ID and he didn't even check mine. Granted, I wasn't sporting a beard and wearing my flannel pj's.....but, you would think that during wartime, they would check ALL ID's. Way to go, Homeland Security.

Caine and I went to visit Joe today to bring him his life blood.......potato chips. He's addicted.
We also hit our local music store to buy some guitar strings. OMG.....I've never seen so many beautiful guitars.....they ARE a work of art. I wish we had enough dough to buy Caine a Fender Stratocaster for Christmas. :-( He's doing really well playing.......as for me, I'm way behind. I just haven't had the time.

Well, I'm off to finish up the afghan I made for my MIL. I'm such a peach. :-)

2005-11-15T11:18:00.000-05:00

Greetings from us old folks!

Yes, I'm at Mom's for a few days and enjoying the thought of just lazing around while I'm here. I rolled out of bed at 10am and I'm still in my jammies. I just might stay in my jammies all freakin' day!

Well, I'm off to watch some tv and find something to munch on.

The Queen is signing off for now.

:-)

2005-11-04T08:32:00.000-05:00

Busy bee

Caulking, glazing, painting has been my forte for the past couple of weeks. Man, I'm TIRED! From the time I get up till dinner, I haven't stopped. I inherited my "handiness" from my Father. I've never been afraid to get my hands dirty and do the so called "manly" jobs. If it wasn't for me, some things wouldn't get done around here. ::ahem::

Yesterday we stopped by to visit Joe and bring him some snacks. I had another gagging attack........I can't stand it anymore!!!! His urinal grosses me out so much, even if I just think about it I lurch. He fuckin' spits in it....the friggin' rim is coated with yellow, sticky, phlem. Why he does this, I have no answer. He's been yelled at by the nurses, by me, by Mom.........it's SO NOT sanitary to put that thing on your mouth! Imagine having to kiss him?? No friggin' way. ::shiver:: He claims he's from another planet........I'm starting to believe him.

2005-10-28T22:23:00.000-05:00

Happy Halloweenie!

Tomorrow our local little ghouls and goblins will be out gathering their treats. Our town always has trick or treating on the Saturday before the acutal Halloween day, from 2 to 5pm. Yup, I find it weird too.

Nothing much going on over here. It's nice and frosty out, just like I like it. I'm so glad summer is over.......it was a long, hot one. Blech.

We put in a new metal front door (6 panel fan lite) and a thermal insulated storm door......tomorrow we will be putting up the trim on the inside. I've also been re-glazing the windows....we can't afford new ones, so hopefully this will help with our heating costs. We'll be running space heaters in the living room and family room to save on oil. I don't even want to think about the price of heating oil this winter!

Mom was down for a few days to visit. The next time she comes I'll be going back with her......I need a mini, lazy, do nothin', veggitative type vacation. It seems I never have any time to myself anymore. I enjoy my space.....I need MY space.

Well, I'm off to bed.......got lots to do tomorrow. Nighty nite.

2005-10-08T20:30:00.000-05:00

Kate.............I haven't been deported, however, a stint in Paris would be nice! Wanna go? I haven't been to INS yet.....and not in any hurry to go either. I'm pretty sure I'm a citizen by parent, I just need to get my birth certificate translated. See what those damn terrorists accomplished? You have to go thru hell and high water just to get a photo ID.

To my loopie (if you are a loopie, you know who I mean) readers, sorry I haven't been around lately. Between all the family rig-a-ma-row and work, I haven't had the ambition to even post and keep up with my buddies. I'm in a funk. Blech. So much has happened since the last time I posted. Mom has been down here with us quite a bit. Joe is doing fine, driving all the nurses crazy and eating like it's going out of style. He called me this morning to place his order for our visit today.......3 peaches, 2 bags of chips, 1 bag of cheese curls, fig newtons and cherry tomatoes. All of this will most likely be eaten by tomorrow......I kid you not.
I've developed an awful symptom when visiting him.......I tend to gag, and it ruins MY appetite for the whole day. I gagged the whole visit today and even at Home Depot after we left him. You have to be there to understand why. Hopefully I can get over this.....cuz if it keeps up, I won't want to visit him anymore.

I'm still practicing the guitar when I get time.......I learned the intro to, "Enter Sandman" (Metallica) and the Happy Birthday song. I'm also practicing the chords. Damn, are my finger tips sore.....and they peel too!

All in all, things are okay here...everyone is healthy.......can't complain too much.

2005-09-20T20:29:00.000-05:00

Say What?

This afternoon hubby and I finally got our asses in gear to go and get a County picture ID card. We don't have pictures on our drivers licenses since they both don't expire until 2007 (then it will be mandatory), so we figured we'd get a county ID instead.
Well, looking for the Court House, we ended up at Motor Vehicles anyway. I explained to a woman there what we wanted and found out that..........

I just might not be an American citizen!!!!!!! (hey now!) Since I have a German birth certificate........I HAVE to go to INS for my Naturalization Papers! Ain't that some shit??

Mom always figured that since my Dad was an American citizen, that I would automatically be one even though I was born in Germany.

All of this has disturbed me a bit.......what if they decide to deport my ass?? Christ.....can that happen? (biting finger nails!)

If anyone has any knowledge about the requirements of citizenship in the good ole USA.......LET ME KNOW!

(whimper)

2005-09-17T06:27:00.000-05:00

It's 7:28am and I'm up posting.......I must be nuts! Actually, I've been up since 6:30 to let the dogs out to do their business. Mom and I already had our cup of tea on the deck. It's so peaceful outside this morning, except for the damn rooster a couple of houses down. What nut keeps a rooster in a residential neighborhood? Sheesh!

I just checked the numbers for the Jersey Mega Million lottery, of course, we're still poor as church mice. Dammit.

Mom had her cortizone shot in her lower back on Thursday........she goes for the next shot in 8 days. Hopefully, this pain management regime works for her.

Guess what I'm going to do now? I'm going back to bed!!! Screw this early bird shit.

Mom and I at the VFW picnic

2005-09-12T08:35:00.000-05:00

Mom and I at the VFW picnic, originally uploaded by CES1.

2005-09-10T19:04:00.000-05:00

Hi ya'll!

I'm posting from Mom's, hubby and I are both here for the weekend. We came over to attend the VFW (Veterans of Foreign Wars) picnic today in Lakehurst (where the Hidenburg crashed) and decided to spend the night. We a nice time at the picnic and had lots of good food and beer. Ever notice how quiet it is at a function until everyone gets tanked? LOL Gawd, it got loud towards the end! The booze was flowing freely!

Tomorrow hubby and I will be heading home. I'll be coming back here on Wednesday to take Mom for her cortizone shot in her spine (she has a pinched nerve near her tail bone) on Thursday.......Friday I'll bring her back to our home for the weekend so I can keep an eye on her.

All in all, everything is fine here in South Jersey! Hope everyone is having a terrific weekend!

2005-09-08T20:07:00.000-05:00

56 Questions that have no meaning or relevance to anything but they are fun.

UNIQUE
1. Nervous habits - Picking at my knees (oh that hurts!)
2. Are you double jointed - No.
3. Can you roll your tongue - Yes.
4. Can you raise one eyebrow at a time - Yes and no (only one eyebrow works)
5. Can you blow spit bubbles - Sure, can't you?
6. Can you cross your eyes - Of course! (careful, they may stay that way!)
7. Tattoos - No tatts.
8. Piercing - Two holes in each ear.
9. Do you make your bed daily - Well, of course...who likes a messy bed?

CLOTHES
10. Which shoe goes on first - Right one.
11. Speaking of shoes, have you ever thrown one at anyone? - not that I can remember.
12. On the average, how much money do you carry - Are you kidding? Cobwebs inhabit my wallet.
13. What jewelry do you wear 24/7 - 3 rings, 2 earrings.
14. Favorite piece of clothing - my soft comfy robe.

FOOD
15. Do you twirl your spaghetti or cut it - I curl it....however, I ain't crazy about it.
16. Have you ever eaten Spam - Love it fried.
17. Do you use extra salt on your food - Yep...I'll pay for it later.
18. How many cereals in your cabinet - 2, Frosted Mini Wheats and Raisan Bran.
19. What's your favorite beverage - Coke or Pepsi.
20. What's your favorite fast food restaurant - Arby's.
21. Do you cook - yes, reluctantly

GROOMING
22. How often do you brush your teeth - Twice a day, more if needed.
23. Hair drying method - Air dry.
24. Have you ever colored/highlighted your hair - Thank God for hair color.....I'm presently a blonde who isn't having much fun.
MANNERS
25. Do you swear - Fuck yeah.
26. Do you ever spit - A lady never spits, but I've seen them do it. Gross!
FAVORITE
27. Animal - Dogs, my dogs
28. Food - King crab legs
29. Month - October
30. Day - Saturday
31. Cartoon - Looney Tunes
32. Shoe brand - If it fits and it's on sale.......I like it.
33. Subject in school - study hall
34. Color - Green
35. Sport - Football...Go Eagles!
36. TV shows - No fav's at the moment.
37. Thing to do in the spring - plant, plant and plant some more.
38. Thing to do in the summer - Sweat your ass off.
39. Thing to do in the autumn - Be glad that summer is over.
40. Thing to do in the winter - Pray for snow.
IN AND AROUND
41. In the CD player - nada.
42. Person you talk most on the phone with - My Mom.
43. Reading - Mary Queen of Scotts.
44. Do you regularly check yourself out in store windows/mirrors - I'm 50.....would you?
45. What color is your bedroom - yellow
46. Do you use an alarm clock - Don't remind me.......I hate the fuckin' thing.
47. Window seat or aisle - Aisle.
DUMB
48. What's your sleeping position - Flamingo position.
49. Even in hot weather do you use a blanket - Yes, don't want anything hanging out that shouldn't be.
50. Do you snore - My snoring wakes ME up.
51. Do you sleepwalk - not yet.
52. Do you talk in your sleep - How would I know, I'm busy snoring.
53. Do you sleep with stuffed animals - Does hubby count?
54. How about with the light on - nope.
55. Do you fall asleep with the TV or radio on - Yup.
56. Last interesting person you met - If I had met someone, I forgot....musta not been that interesting.

MeBear

2005-09-06T21:59:00.000-05:00

MeBear, originally uploaded by CES1.

A bear and the back of my noggin.

MomBear

2005-09-06T21:57:00.000-05:00

MomBear, originally uploaded by CES1.

Mom with the bears at our visit to the Popcorn Zoo.

BBCaine

2005-09-06T21:52:00.000-05:00

BBCaine, originally uploaded by CES1.

My handsome son getting in some practicing. He's learning so fast! We all know where he got his brains from. ::ahem:: :-)

2005-09-03T20:33:00.000-05:00

Thank God things are finally progressing in the Big Easy. I agreed with one of the commentators on the news, these people shouldn't be called refugees......they are citizens of this country.....unfortunately, displaced citizens.

A big thumbs up for Texas! It's so wonderful how they opened their doors and hearts for these desperate people. If I lived close by, I would most certainly volunteer my help.

On another note........it's so disconcerting how some human beings can become so depraved as to terrorize, kill, and rape helpless people during this desperate situation. They should leave these animals in the muck and let them die a horrible, stinking death.

As for me........all is fine over here! Hubby and I had a tickle fest this evening....I almost peed myself from laughing. We also figured out how old folks make love......."they take breaks". ::blushing::

We'll, I'm off to watch more news and treat myself to a couple of chocolate chip cookies.

2005-09-03T08:38:00.000-05:00

So many images have been imbedded in my mind these past few days. I find myself weeping throughout the day........I feel humbled in the face of suffering. Now still, I'm at a lose for words.
The children, the elderly.......dying in the streets from lack of water, food, and medicine. The image of the old woman slumped over in her wheelchair at the Convention Center......dying.......haunts my soul.
The cries for help that are so late in coming makes me ashamed of my own country.

But still.........I am astounded at the faith these people have in the Lord. My faith is no way near as strong.

2005-09-02T07:24:00.000-05:00

I cannot believe how inept this country is in the face of disaster. I am so disgusted at this point that I'm at a loss for words.

2005-08-26T19:22:00.000-05:00

Mom and I went to the Popcorn Zoo today........what a cool place! I've decided to sponsor two animals..........Boo Boo the bear and Pumpkin the black goat. It's $3 a month for each animal and it makes me feel good that I can help in some way.

Popcorn Zoo

Anyway, we had a great time! I fed the deers by hand, what soft and sweet mouths they have. The goats were a little on the chompy side, I made sure I had all ten fingers when I left them! The pot belly pigs were adorable, but they sure smelled bad. Peeeeuuuuu

I have some pictures to post, but will do that when I return home.

2005-08-25T10:16:00.000-05:00

it's a beautiful morning.......ah huh.

I'm at Mom's, been here since Tuesday. I took her to the orthopedic doctor yesterday, she has to go in for pain management shots in her lower spine. The discs are pressing on her nerves (saw it on the MRI's) and there is no treatment except pain management. Unfortunately, I see a "little rascal" in her future. She wants an orange one with flames and duel exhaust! LOL Maybe we can "chop" it. :-)

Anyhoo, all is fine over here. We will be relaxing today and going to the zoo tomorrow.

Hubby stopped by after his journey to the flea market, he bought me "Washburn" guitar for $40 and it's in great shape. I have to tune it, then I'll drive Mom nuts with my practicing. ::evil grin::

Well, I'm off to entertain the old folks!

2005-08-22T08:42:00.000-05:00

It's been a grueling week around here! Visiting Joe everyday and trying to get some work done. I'm pooped.
I'm leaving with Mom tomorrow to go back to her house for a week. I so need this mini vacation. I plan on being a lazy ass most of the time! We plan on going to the Popcorn Zoo.....I can't wait! :-)
Hey, Kate, maybe we can meet there?!

I haven't had much time to practice the guitar, but I have the part of the Metallica song down pat now and gotten some chord strumming practice in. Hubby picked up a used guitar at the flea market. He paid $60 for an easily $300 guitar!! It's a Yamaha, in mint condition!

Hey, Kathy.......get K started early on the guitar, kids learn so fast. My fingers get a little wacky at times (old age). She will do great and playing AC/DC in no time! You go, K!!! :-) Also, there's lots of lessons online.....just do a search for guitar lessons.

Gotta run, lots to do before I leave!

2005-08-17T07:28:00.000-05:00

too damn cool for words

OMG! I am now playing Metallica's, "Nothing Else Matters" on the guitar! Well, not the whole song, just the beginning. Caine and I were up till past midnight last night learning how to play it. Of course, we were fighting over the guitar too! LOL I am also able to read the music, there are some things we can't understand yet, but WE WILL get it eventually.
I am so excited to learn the guitar.......what a wonderful thing!

Go here for all kinds of sheet music.

2005-08-13T22:18:00.000-05:00

I'm feeling a bit better this evening. I felt so downcast when we got home from the VA home today. It's not an easy place to visit.

After we got home, we decided to try out the Chinese Buffet that we spotted on the way to Atlantic City last weekend. The food sucked. To make matters worse, hubby didn't feel well in the restaurant and we had to leave. They barely had the air conditioning on, it was hot as hell in there. That's so you won't want to hang around and eat too much. lol
Hubby went to bed when we got home and I decided to wash the curtains and windows in the family room. Yes, in this horrendous heat! I was soaked with sweat. Unfortunately, our little air conditioner isn't doing it's job very well. The heat wave we've been having is the worst that I can ever remember. I hate summer.

On a happier note......I'm learning to play the guitar! I've learned to play four chords already! (E, E minor & A, A minor) I have to practice the bar chords to loosen up my fingers. The tips of my fingers are killing me!! Caine is taking lessons from a friend, and I'm learning from Caine. It's too cool! :-)

2005-08-13T15:39:00.000-05:00

Dear God,

Please grant me the strength and courage to continue on my course. I am overwhelmed with sorrow and grief when I look into the eyes of suffering. John's wide smile greeted me today when walking down the hallway......a little man, so gentle, sitting in his wheelchair eating cookies. He once told us that his mother was always in the kitchen. One day I'll be looking for his smile and he won't be there any longer.

I helped Mr. Goodman to bed, walking with him trying to stay in step with his tiny steps. I took off his shoes and opened his mail for him. A lovely card from a family member. Mr. Goodman likes to ring the nurses bell, it's a game to him. The nurses aren't happy with Mr. Goodman.

My new found friend, Polo, is dying. I saw him in the hallway and asked if he was okay. His dementia told me that people have been hurting him. He said, "I was a Marine, I will carry on, but I don't want to be hurt anymore. I wish they would stop." I stopped to speak with him on my way out........he cried and held my hand. He said I was a good woman, I said to him that he was a good man. Will he be there when I return to visit again?

Tears, tears and more tears.............my heart aches so much for these gentle souls. I think of my Dad and his suffering, the pain I feel is so deep, as if my heart is being strangled.

I now feel the same thing for all these strangers that are now a part of my life.

2005-08-11T19:58:00.000-05:00

thinking of yesterday

I'm sitting hear with the head phones blasting in my ears jamming to, Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young. Gosh, the memories of that time in my life. I grew up in the most radical of times.......from, "Leave it to Beaver", to, "Woodstock". Throw in some Vietnam War, flower children, sex, drugs and rock n' roll......a unique time in history.......and I'm glad I experienced it.
I guess you could have labeled me as a freak/psyche, or the most common name for that generation of young people, a hippie (at least I thought I was). I was the first girl to wear hip-hugger bell bottoms in high school. I attended war protests at the State Capital and various moratoriums, hubby marched in Washington DC. I did drugs (mostly pot and speed), I hitchhiked when I had to, got drunk on beer and Boon's Farm apple wine, skipped school when I felt like it, ditched my bra sometimes, attended some really wild parties, hung out whenever I could. As for "Free Love", I never got into that. I was a good girl that way, I did have some respect for myself! lol
The good ole days.
::sigh::

2005-08-09T11:20:00.000-05:00

casino trip

We had a really nice time at Harrah's Casino. However, we didn't win the BIG one, not even close. We spent about $70 on the slots and brought home about $140.....so, I can't complain too much. We had dinner at the Fantasea Reef Buffet.......Hubby took his hollow leg along........gawd, he ate enough for all 4 of us! lol

All in all, it was good to do something different! I did forget to bring my camera......big dummy. We had a wonderful view of the Marina from the 4th level parking garage, I could have taken some really nice shots of the boats on the bay. Next time!

2005-08-06T09:27:00.000-05:00

Joe was discharged from the hospital and is now back at the VA home. All is well.

Today we are taking off and doing something fun for once. We are heading down to Atlantic City later on and going to try to win our retirement money. ::ahem::
We're going to Harrah's for the buffet and do a little gambling. I'm looking forward to it!! :-)

Wish us luck! I'll let you know if we hit the BIG one!

2005-08-03T10:08:00.000-05:00

Activity room at the VA home. (left to right)

Aunt Teddi, me, hubby, Joe, Mom. Mom and I just happen to be wearing the same tops that day. Sheesh!

2005-08-03T09:41:00.000-05:00

hot and tired

It's been a couple of hectic days around here. Joe was taken to the hospital on Monday with chills and a slight fever. We've been running back and forth to see him and trying to get some work done in between. We're still not sure what's wrong with him......the doctor's haven't given us any clear answers as of yet. It's just a wait and see thing right now.

Gawd, how much I hate summer! It's so friggin' hot and humid here.......instant sweat. I'm counting the days until fall arrives! Even the dogs hate to go outside!

Well, off to clean up and get ready to head to the hospital.

2005-07-31T21:04:00.000-05:00

achin' headache

Ever have one of those pounder headaches that feel worse when you bend down? You know, the kind that throb. I've had one of these all day long. ::sigh::
I'm sure it's because of what happened yesterday. One of the gentlemen in Joe's room passed away yesterday morning. When hubby and I walked in the room, all of his clothes were piled on his bed, he wasn't there. I knew what happened right away....and Joe's aide comfirmed it. He died just that morning. We saw him Wednesday, he always smiled and waved at us.....Mom even helped him put on his jacket that day. Now he is gone. It hit me right in the gut. You can't imagine how hard it is going to the home.......you never know who will be there one day and gone the next. It's all so very, very sad.

On a lighter note. We are getting ready to install a fish pond in the yard. Our neighbor gave us a 125 gallon pond form (it's big enough to take a bath in it!), now someone has to dig the hole! ::ahem:: And it ain't gonna be me! lol We priced pumps and fountains today, once the form is in place we will buy all the stuff we need. I can't wait! Hubby isn't too thrilled about it, but no worries, I'll be taking care of the fishies. He can be such a poop sometimes. ::razzberries::

At this moment, my Aunt is on her flight back to Germany. Hopefully, she will be able to come back next year.......I will miss her.

Well, off to read my book! Nitey nite, all.

2005-07-29T15:03:00.000-05:00

To my friends.......I am here, just not on "here". Lately, all of my spare time has been spent reading. I just finished a wonderful and enlightening novel, a New York Times bestseller, "Mary Called Magdalene", by Margaret George. (my favorite historical fiction author). Visit her website here.

Today I received my next read, "Mary Queen of Scotland and the Isles", by the same author. The novel was a National Bestseller.
I hear she is working on a novel about Helen of Troy!! I can't wait!

How much I love historical fiction......you learn so much. The thicker the novel, the better! I can't wait to sink my teeth into this one, it's huge!

So, if I'm not around much.........you know what I'm doing. :-)

2005-07-20T21:27:00.000-05:00

I'm not dead.......

hope I didn't disappoint anyone! lol
I returned home today from visiting Mom and my Aunt (not "ant") from Germany, I was there for a week for some R&R. Actually, I had way too much R&R.......with this heatwave we're having, we didn't do much outside the home. Lots of lying around, laughing, eating, and watching DVD's. I'm not complaining, just stating the facts (that's our new motto around here). None of us complain, we just state the facts. Joe turned us on to this one....I gotta hand it to him, that's a good one!

(I'm going to rant now, so if anyone is offended by my lack of compassion.....piss off.)

Joe was dying all week. We called him twice a day, everyday, and he was in constant dying mode. He even called MY home (9:30 at night) to have hubby call Mom, to tell her he was dying. ::eye roll:: He had no snacks left for Christ's sake.....no wonder he was dying! Nope, Mom didn't fall for the ploy, I am SO proud of her! She did call the nurses station to find out if anything was wrong with him.....of course, he was just fine. He's had 91 years to perfect his art of manipulation.....and he's honed it to the "T". My poor Mom.....but, she's finally learning.
Today we all stopped by to visit him (told him we would be there Wednesday), we usually visit twice a week and CALL everyday. See, we aren't totally evil. lol
Anyway......Mom brought him some ribs that she cooked, he was pissed because we were late and he ate his lunch already. He didn't want them until we had settled in in the activity room for some pleasant chatting. (I coulda guessed that would happen) So, Mom brings him the ribs......he starts chowing down, sucking bones and such.....then announces that he is going to throw up. Hubby grabs a waste can..(he states that he doesn't want to puke in a waste can!) WTF?..Auntie and I remove ourselves from the situation but within earshot.......(gross).......and he continues to gorge himself on ribs. How can he continue to eat when sick to his stomach???? Hubby is ready to puke himself, Auntie and I leave the situation all together......I don't know what the hell Mom did. When we returned a few minutes later we can hear him bellowing at the top of his lungs, "What, are you trying to kill me??!!!" ::sigh:: Mom had just bumped his foot against the table leg trying to manuver his wheel chair......and he had shoes on!
I felt like smacking the shit out of him. We've all had it up to here (running hand across forehead) with his fucking antics.

I'm going to bed, I've had a looonng and not so amusing day.

2005-07-05T20:54:00.000-05:00

nothing on tv, so I decided to share this with you all.

The Palace of Depression

This place is practically in my back yard, it's just down the street in the woods. I haven't been back there to see it yet.....one of these days we'll get a peek at it. It's being restored now and we don't want to venture in, it's probably off limits at the moment.

There's lots of stuff on the palace on google. If interested, do a search. Enjoy!

2005-07-05T20:04:00.000-05:00

I'm in a....

funk today. Kinda grouchy and not in the mood to talk.....like I need a little space or something. It's been a tough couple of weeks around here.....I'm tired. Mom left for home today, I miss her already. However, having her around makes me lazy, I've been slacking on my work and hubby isn't too happy about that. I've also been shopping alot..(sorry, hon!)..Mom and I are shopper-holics. If we were together all the time, we'd be living in cardboard boxes and dumpster diving. But, hey, I got some really nice outfits! :-)

Not much to blog about tonight......so, I'm off to do something productive......like watch TV. Heh

2005-07-04T22:20:00.000-05:00

Not Your Average Blind Date

(WARNING! Not for the average church goer, unless you go to confession regularly)

2005-07-04T20:29:00.000-05:00

Mom and I at the Veterans Home today.

The old building behind us will be demolished once the new building is up and running. It's going to be beautiful! They are also going to restore the wheel chair garden so the residents can plant veggie gardens again. How cool is that?

When Mom walked passed the day room.......all the guys were whistling at her! LOL I missed it, I was sitting with Joe. Too funny! We brought him BBQ ribs today.....his favorite meal. He enjoyed them ear to ear.

All in all, a good day. Mom is leaving for home tomorrow. My Aunt is coming from Germany on Sunday.....I'll be going over there sometime next week for my mini vacation. I CAN'T WAIT!!!

2005-07-04T09:33:00.000-05:00

Happy 4th!
Celebrate safely!

2005-07-03T22:07:00.000-05:00

hair on her teeth

I should just let it go.....but being from Jersey, I can't, and I know I'll be sorry in the morning. New Jerseyians are a feisty bunch and, "Yo, Bitch", we take no shit from anyone. First of all, I'm pissed that Miss Allison slithered over to my blog, did some actual research (sheesh), bit me and then cowardly crawled back into her hole.
Talk about gettin' a friggin' life? Whoa, Woman! Who's the one without a life here?
I don't troll people's blogs and leave nasty comments........believe it or not, I don't have time for playing silly games.......nor am I that immature.

Gawd, thank you, thank you for not going Freudian on me.......how boring. ::yawn:: I rather twittle my thumbs and spit bee-bees than listen to your self rightous prattle.

I removed our "business" website from my blog.......can't have idiots showing up on my doorstep handing out brochures telling me to repent from my wickedness.

I also removed the picture I had of Joe. Yes, that was down right mean of me. I admit my mistake.

Okay......I'm done with this Allison bullshit. Dear Lady, if and when you wish to comment on my blog again........do me a favor.........don't snipe me and run. I don't respect cowardly opinions.

2005-07-03T12:18:00.000-05:00

happy anniversary to us

Today is our 32nd wedding anniversary! Remarkable, huh? In this day and age, it's quite an accomplishment.......I think so anyway.
We've had a wonderful life together all these years.......I'd never trade him in on a new model, no man out there could ever fill his shoes. We have a wonderful son and a nice home, two lovable pooches, no huge bank account......but, very happy with what we've built together. We never fight (what's the use?) and we laugh alot. The key to a happy and healthy marriage?........respect, understanding, a good ear, teamwork, and of course..........love.

2005-07-03T11:23:00.000-05:00

it was bound to happen

I just got my first unappreciative comment from someone named Allison. BTW....thanks for stopping by and not leaving the link to YOUR blog! ::ahem::
Before you judge this South Jersey dweller, I'll send you some of my rancid, fart smelling shoes and you can shelp around in them for a day.

I do not disprespect my elders, and I definitely do not disrespect my stepfather. I rant on "MY" blog when the going gets tough.......hopefully, you will never have to go through this experience with your loved ones. I do everything I can to make him comfortable, make sure he has plenty to eat, make sure he is cleaned, make sure he joins in the activites in the home, and most of all, make sure he is happy. I visit him all the time, I hold his hand, I tell him that I love him......and I do. ALSO Dear Lady! I visit the other veterans in the home.....I bring in a little sunshine everytime I visit. When was the last time you took some time to visit the elderly in a nursing home?? When? (yeah, sure)

BTW.....I did the same for my dying Dad......I was there for him. Making sure he was comfortable in the hospice and held him in my arms while he screamed when the nurses treated his bed sores. Spoon fed him when his hands curled up like claws. You get the picture, right?

You say I'm selfish? fuck you.

If he frustrates me and I have to rant on my blog......well, so be it. If I say things that make people uncomfortable........well, so be it. I talk about life on my blog, rose colored glasses excluded. If you don't like what I say.........move on to a more fluffy blog.

The next time YOU fart, Princess Allison........just think of me.

2005-07-01T21:36:00.000-05:00

more friday

Anyone going to the Philly Live 8 concert? We live so close, but I couldn't fathom going........a million people expected to attend? All these people on the parkway? No way a million people will fit......sardines, yes.......people, no. BTW......leave your tin cans at home.

2005-07-01T21:05:00.000-05:00

friday

We headed over to see Joe (stepdad) this morning to bring him more snacks. Either HE ate all the snacks that he had over there, or someone else helped themselves. It could go either way.
We walked in the room and he's laying there with is pants down and skid marks all over the bed. He has a terrible habit of pulling his pants down and plastering wet farts on the sheet. If he would just keep his pants up, this unpleasantness would be hidden in his BVD's. I am so tired of seeing his wrinkled NUTS and shitty ass. ::sigh::
Fortunately, his aide came in and washed him up.......of course, we exited the room and waited for her to finish. I felt so sorry for her! What a shitty job! Blech.
I may sound a little harsh when speaking of him here.......but, he is the worst pain in the butt that ever walked the earth. I love him, but at times I don't like him very much. Hubby and I have dubbed him as, "Baby Hughy". He acts just like a big over grown baby......ALL the time.

2005-06-30T07:53:00.000-05:00

morning conversation

me..."I have so much to do, I feel like shooting myself".

hubby...."If you do, shoot yourself in the foot."

me...."okay."

2005-06-29T21:16:00.000-05:00

How about that title....colorful, huh? I love color. Just go here and you can make one too. :-)

I see that Wendi had a serious problem at the grocery store today. I just had to laugh when I read her post.
Having a case of the poots in my family is a hilarious event. If you're dying for some attention around my house, just fart. You become a focal point for laughter and appreciation that a sound like that came from a human asshole.....especially a feminine asshole. Sometimes I do myself proud.

Fifty must be the age when being gassy is a constant event. I find breaking wind is a part of my daily activities since I became a half a century old. Wal-Mart brings out the worst of my new habit......this store gives me tremendous gas. As soon as I step through the door and meet the greeter, I feel that pressure in my lower tummy and colon. Sometimes I can walk and squeeze my cheeks at the same time.....other times I have to stop and pretend I'm looking at something. Then there are the times that I can't hold it anymore and find a nice uninhabited isle, and let loose. Checking out is the worst. No one wants to fart in the check out line.....people are too close. They will know it's you. Luckily, I haven't encountered that problem..........YET.

2005-06-29T08:59:00.000-05:00

turning my brain off....

Ever wish you could do that? Just flick a switch and float in perfect nothingness?

It's been hell week over here, hubby and I are feeling the after effects. I'm totally exhausted and he's in bed with a migraine. My house is a mess and I'm late paying the bills......I have lead in my ass and just want to zone out and do nothing. What caused all this dysfunction and sickness?

My Stepdad.

A 91 year old infant who still wants to suckle on mother's breast. Never in my life have I met someone so selfish, so self absorbed, so damn narcissistic that I just want to vomit pea soup all over some priest. (well, I wouldn't go that far)

The demon was finally admitted to the Veterans Memorial Home this past Thursday. He has done nothing but drive all of us nuts with his whining, complaining, bitching, moaning, and then denying all of the above. "I don't complain" and "I know what I know", crap. Joe, might be 91 years old, but his mind is as sharp as a pin. However, he has a selective memory, he just wants to remember what he wants to.
As far as treatment goes in this place, he expects a handmaiden (to hover over him), a butler (to go get) and a personal ass wiper (well, you know what that involves). **BTW........my Mom was all of the above for many years, until it drove her to the edge of insanity**. With 144 other men in the place to care for, he is not going to get personal service. It ain't the friggin' Hilton!

From my observations, the "Home" is so so. Not the best place, but not the worst either. The building is old, but a new building is going up now, it will be completed in October. All the residents will be moved to brand new rooms, with 2 men to a room. He is now in a room with 3 other men.
The staff is very friendly and the care is adequate. The food seems to be pretty good, but sometimes arrives luke warm. Not a huge deal in my opinion. Hey.....we BRING him food, so he is getting plenty to eat. Joe's main ambition in life is to lay in bed and EAT......and of course, shit. When he was at home, he would shit at least 5 to 7 times a day........many times, he missed the toilet. Now you can understand why he is in a home.

For all the war mongers out there, take a trip to your local Veteran's Home.....hell, take a picnic lunch if you like. Better yet, take a fucking camera! See for yourself what WAR does to human beings........you might change your tune about supporting a war. ::ahem::

I cried the first day I entered the place. I sat outside with hubby and balled my eyes out.
The vacant stares, the lost limbs, the mumbling, the drooling.......men in wheel chairs crowding the hallways. Friendly men, seriously angry men, hopelessly sad men, young men, old men......sadness, despair................our VETERANS.

I'm glad Joe is blind and doesn't see the madness.

2005-06-23T22:16:00.000-05:00

I wish I could.......

let out a good long fart, or a mighty burp........I am SO full and bloated! We went to Red Lobster tonight and I pigged out on lobster chops, scallops, rice, fries, stuffed mushrooms, clam strips, crab legs, coke and beer. I'm ready to explode!
I usually don't feed my face this much, but I just go gaa-gaa when I dine at Red Lobster.

Stick a pin in me and let the air out.

Tums, I need Tums.

2005-06-23T09:42:00.000-05:00

I know, I know.......

another title change. I'm done, I promise.

2005-06-23T07:56:00.000-05:00

I'm back!

I've been at Mom's since Sunday, her and I drove back here yesterday. Mom will be staying here till Saturday.
At this moment, Joe (stepdad), is being transferred to the Veteran's Home not to far from me. Mom has to be there at 10am to sign him in and finish up the financial paperwork. The thought that keeps running through my mind is, hopefully he doesn't have to poop on the way down here. He always has to poop at the most inopportune times. Mom just informed me that he will be wearing "Depends"! (thank goodness!)

That's it for now......got a long day ahead of us.

2005-06-18T21:16:00.000-05:00

getting your burn

Know what that is? If you've been to an NHRA drag race, with no doubt, you will know.
I got the burn once, once was enough for me. Now when I hear an engine start up, I run.
What s getting a burn? First, you gotta find which way the wind is blowing. Preferably in your face. Then find yourself a top fuel dragster that's getting ready to test the engine. Stand as close as you can. When the engine starts, you inhale the nitro cloud
that is enveloping you. No mistaking the cloud, it's a yellowish color. Your eyes burn so bad that you automatically tear up. The inside of your chest burns too, you can't breathe. You cough, gag, your nose runs, you just might toss your cookies, or that hamburger you just ate.

This is what my son does when he goes to the drags. He always gets his burn. He got his burn today at Englishtown.

Nuts, huh?

2005-06-18T17:46:00.000-05:00

okay kids

I changed the title of my blog. For the umpteenth time. So, update if you have linked me.
Yes, I am that frustrated little girl.

2005-06-18T16:14:00.000-05:00

Talking with Dad

After almost 2 years after his death I think it's now time for me to get things straight with him....or, myself......talk to him in typed words, talking to him verbally when the mood strikes me can look and sound a little nutty to others. Many times my hubby has asked me, "What did you say?"......feeling a bit embarrassed, I'd say, "Nothing, Hon, just mumbling to myself". I was actually talking to, Dad.

I have a lot to say to my Dad. He wasn't the best dad a little girl could hope for.
I can't say that he did is best with raising me.....I don't think he had a "best". He lived in his own world, shutting out all that loved him.......hurting all the people he needed the most. It's true, you always do hurt the ones you love.

I'll be talking a lot about my Dad on this blog for the foreseeable future. It's time for me to make peace with him and with myself.
I have to get rid of the pain in my stomach and heart. I will call my release, Verbal Vomit. Maybe I should change the title of my blog to that? I might.

2005-06-18T07:39:00.000-05:00

Dear Daddy,

Unknowing to me, today was my last day to be with you. If had known, I would have climbed up in your bed and held you in my arms the whole hour that I was allowed. As always, you asked me for "puddin'". You would only eat a couple of spoons full, then turn your head. Your mouth was so dry looking, parched. Your tongue was coated with white stuff, it worried me. The nurse brought in some ice chips, I fed them to you. You seemed to enjoy them, I bet the cold wet felt good in your mouth. You kept whispering for more. You were so pale, but still, there was some blushing in your cheeks. I held your knarled hands, your fingernails so blue. I wanted to put lotion on your forehead, your skin was so dry. I kissed and smelled your head, just like I kissed and smelled Caine's head when he was a baby. You were a baby now, all curled up....so helpless.
At one point, you looked at me.......such a look of concern on your face, eyes wide open.....like you were scared, or ashamed. I asked you what was wrong. You said, "I think I poo-pooed in my pants." I asked you if you wanted me to check, you said a definite, NO. I think you were ashamed, you didn't want to have me, your daughter, to check your diaper. I could feel your shame, Dad........but, it didn't matter to me, it was perfectly okay. I told the guard that I needed an aid to change your diaper. I looked when your diaper was opened, I don't think you knew that. You hadn't messed, probably just gas. Your bed sores were getting better, I always looked at your sores when I was there, I wanted to make sure they were being cared for. They were. Your butt was so tiny, the skin so smooth......a baby's butt. It bothered me so much that you were so thin.....just skin and bones. Why were you that way? I couldn't understand why you were so deathly thin. I remember an earlier visit I asked you why you were so thin, you said, "I don't know". Dad, it still bothers me to this day. I can't get the sight of you out of my mind. My worse fears for you come true.
So many questions I had for you, but you rarely talked. Mostly stared at the TV without really watching it. I wanted to be in your mind, experience what you had been through. Well, maybe it's best that I couldn't. I can't even imagine what your life was like these past 18 years.
You napped alot this day, all curled up on your side, your knees drawn up in a fetal position. I sat beside you and touched you, looked at you, really looked at you. Your ears, your nose, your hair, your closed eyelids, your sunken mouth, your skin, your curled up hands. I still see you in my mind........I can smell you sometimes.
I wanted to crawl inside of you, be you and I as one, just for a moment.
Remember the cards I would send you, the ones with the Mountain picture on the front? I would draw stick figures of you and I holding hands on the mountain. We were supposed to see a mountain together one day. Remember that?
It was time for us to leave, my hour with you was up. Hubby said his goodbye to you, telling you that he'll see you next week. I kissed you on the forehead, told you that I loved you and that I would see you next week. I didn't want to go. I wanted to stay. As I walked out of your room to the guard that was to escort us out, I looked back at you. This was the first time I had ever done that. I looked back at you to see you one more time......to take you in, to absorb you in some way. You didn't look back at me....I wished you had.

My Dad went home to the Lord two days later, on the 20th of June 2003. He died all alone in a prison hospice, in South Woods State Prison in Bridgeton, NJ. The day he died, I knew it already before the social worker called to tell me.

I love you, Daddy........I miss you.

2005-06-14T13:44:00.000-05:00

thinking......

I'm toying with the idea of getting a job. I haven't been in the job market since 1993.
I'm thinking about, "Michael's". Sure, my paycheck will be spent before it's earned.........but, I'm really thinking about it.
Another option, Michael's is looking for someone to give classes on the basics of knitting and crocheting. I can do that! I know I'll be nervous as heck, inclined to giggle and probably trip over my tongue.....but, I think I could handle it and not die in the process.

hmmmmmmmmmmm..................

2005-06-13T21:19:00.000-05:00

Gee, Not Guilty.....

Who woulda thunk it?
Yes, I was on pins and needles waiting for the verdict. All of us were glued to the tv like a bunch of vultures, waiting for word that something dramatic had happened in the court room. Like someone fainted or threw up. lol I figured a hung jury, not a clean sweep of not guilty. I'm a little surprised at the verdict.......however, with the past verdicts of some infamous celebrities (Blake & Simpson), I shouldn't be.
Hopefully, Jacko with get his shit together "this time" and stop entertaining little boys in his bedroom.

It's time to tell Peter Pan to take a hike.

2005-06-13T13:12:00.000-05:00

Happy Sweaty Monday!

Yup, the people in the great state of New Jersey are sweatin' buckets today! It's hot and humid as hell. {panting} It's awful, believe me.

Anyone as glued to Court TV as I am? I know, I know, I should have better things to do with my time......and I do. However, I can't help myself. I'm dying to know the verdict and I don't want to miss all the hubb-bubb when it all comes down. My guess is a hung jury. Yes, my life is lacking in excitement.

I want to wish my dear friend, Kate, a very Happy Birthday! She and I share the same date for our birthdays.....the 13th. However, not the same year (or month). She's MUCH older than I am!! :-) Yes, that's a lie. I was coloring my hair before she was even born! Love ya, Babe! (yes, she IS a babe!)

Well, back to the tube.