I'm not dead.......

hope I didn't disappoint anyone! lol
I returned home today from visiting Mom and my Aunt (not "ant") from Germany, I was there for a week for some R&R. Actually, I had way too much R&R.......with this heatwave we're having, we didn't do much outside the home. Lots of lying around, laughing, eating, and watching DVD's. I'm not complaining, just stating the facts (that's our new motto around here). None of us complain, we just state the facts. Joe turned us on to this one....I gotta hand it to him, that's a good one!

(I'm going to rant now, so if anyone is offended by my lack of compassion.....piss off.)

Joe was dying all week. We called him twice a day, everyday, and he was in constant dying mode. He even called MY home (9:30 at night) to have hubby call Mom, to tell her he was dying. ::eye roll:: He had no snacks left for Christ's sake.....no wonder he was dying! Nope, Mom didn't fall for the ploy, I am SO proud of her! She did call the nurses station to find out if anything was wrong with him.....of course, he was just fine. He's had 91 years to perfect his art of manipulation.....and he's honed it to the "T". My poor Mom.....but, she's finally learning.
Today we all stopped by to visit him (told him we would be there Wednesday), we usually visit twice a week and CALL everyday. See, we aren't totally evil. lol
Anyway......Mom brought him some ribs that she cooked, he was pissed because we were late and he ate his lunch already. He didn't want them until we had settled in in the activity room for some pleasant chatting. (I coulda guessed that would happen) So, Mom brings him the ribs......he starts chowing down, sucking bones and such.....then announces that he is going to throw up. Hubby grabs a waste can..(he states that he doesn't want to puke in a waste can!) WTF?..Auntie and I remove ourselves from the situation but within earshot.......(gross).......and he continues to gorge himself on ribs. How can he continue to eat when sick to his stomach???? Hubby is ready to puke himself, Auntie and I leave the situation all together......I don't know what the hell Mom did. When we returned a few minutes later we can hear him bellowing at the top of his lungs, "What, are you trying to kill me??!!!" ::sigh:: Mom had just bumped his foot against the table leg trying to manuver his wheel chair......and he had shoes on!
I felt like smacking the shit out of him. We've all had it up to here (running hand across forehead) with his fucking antics.

I'm going to bed, I've had a looonng and not so amusing day.